Yesterday night was one of those darn lonely moments for me that can drive people to end themselves.
It’s not like I can simply close my eyes and try going to sleep; I am running away from sleep deliberately.
Why? Because sleep gives me dreams… particular dreams.. very similar to what I keep dreaming every time I go to sleep from last 5 months. I don’t know how to get rid of these dreams. Same faces, same people, taunting me, provoking me saying ‘We’ve taken away what you loved the most. What can you do now?’, laughing at me, putting a dagger in my heart and then stomping it hardly further down to rip it apart.
And I see someone doing stuff that I can’t bear, stuff that I don’t want to write here.
So I try my max not to sleep; better than dreaming those and waking up in immense anger, heart rate soaring and sweating all over.
As to why I ride?
I ride to heal my heart.
May be I should be included in this video list next time 🙂
Unfortunately yesterday, no redbull left in the fridge 😐
To compensate, I go out to ride in the dark for a bit (around 0230 am). Now normally I’d do a 120+, but this time I thought let’s try something different. I drove at about 10kmph or less… found a slow sloping road, literally put my track-ready sport bike in Neutral gear!!! (I know couple of bikers will be cursing me over this), and let is just cruise to angle of slope and gravity.
This really gives a slow motion feel. Although, people who drive regularly in city traffic may not feel a difference, but I specifically got myself a bike to help me get away to adrenaline rush drives when I have to escape falling asleep. So I don’t really take it into the city.. just the highways.
Everything looks moving slllowwwwly, its a niiiceeeeee experience.. feels good, especially when the surrounding is pitch black dark, with scary looking trees that block visibility to anything on one side and vast empty darkness of plain lands on the other side.
It kinda feels like this:
And THEN, when you rip open your throttle.. it feels like this (darn I want to drive at Isle of Man too) :
This is my pic of closure, riding towards unknown lands..
The Heartbroken Biker